I'm kidding. Sort of. Okay, obviously my life is not perfect, my husband is in Japan, my ass is kinda fat, and I need to do the dishes. BUT. Aside from that pointless shit... I live in HAWAII. 

Yes. The islands. You know that place people dream about and everyone with the perfect bodies go in the movies?!? Yes. I live there. And it's phenomenal. There is far less beach volleyball than I expected.. Also apparently locals don't like when you run up to them yelling "JOHNNY TSUNAMI I LOVE YOUR WORK!!!" I don't know, don't ask me.. But, Hawaii is different from the mainland in so many ways that when you first get here you experience quite the culture shock. For instance I didn't know what a "pupu" was and why the hell anyone would want to eat it. 

But holy Hawaii Batman.  I cannot even BEGIN to explain the beautiful adventures and amazing opportunities that this tiny little island has provided me.

Since I have moved here I have really tried to focus on experiencing the moments that I'm having, instead of trying to document them all. It's very hard because a lot of it is literally too beautiful not to photograph. But I think it's a rare thing in our society for someone to sit and watch an amazing sunset and just soak every second in. Not trying to capture it or show all your friends.. But instead. embedding it into your own memory, simply by sitting and watching. 

So since this is just part one... 

The Hikes: 

I've never been an "outdoorsmen" (outdoorswoman??) or a hiker. I enjoy the ritzier lifestyle the majority of the time. But my god. If there is any state that is going to turn you into a hiker it is Hawaii (and I'm FROM Colorado). Yes, I know these aren't hikes up 14,000 feet or hikes in Rocky Mountain snow. But these are hikes with views that are not comparable to any place in the world. Standing on Koko Head and looking over the entire ocean and the Honolulu "skyline" or hiking behind the Pali in mud for an hour looking for a waterfall. Even if it is something as simple as the Lighthouse Hike in Kailua, you get the best views of the Windward side and some of the bluest waters out there. Each and every hike has so much to offer. There are still literally 50 hikes that I still need  to do and I'm so so so excited to go on adventures and do them. You can NEVER be bored in Hawaii, and if you are; it's your personality, don't blame the state for  you being basic. 

These are experiences that I will never forget. I've already multiplied my hike ratio by about 15 since I moved here, since before I had done about 1 total. Now I want to hike every weekend. So really it's a win/win for me because I get to explore this beautiful state and also get my work out on. My theme song for all hikes right now is Anaconda by Nicki Minaj because it's really heartfelt and the lyrics just speak to me, it's really personal because MY ANACONDA DON'T WANT NONE UNLESS YOU GOT BUNS HUN. 

I will edit this and add a list of the official names of the hikes I've done so far and my favorites so you guys can try to stalk me on the trails. See you at the top of Koko Head suckers. 

In conclusion: Hawaii is Love. 

Not sure if you got the theme here...?

 I'm so ridiculously lucky that I could con my husband into marrying me so I could move here. 

I'm sorry, I meant *so lucky to live in this beautiful place. 

This is awkward. 

Yes I am haole posing in every single one of these photos. Come at me.